Day 73: Why Does a Cheap Thrill Feel So Dirty?

Tonight I watched WEC on TV and sat there wondering the entire time why the hell I was watching WEC on TV. For that matter, why was I even watching “Versus,” that obscure cable channel that I couldn’t find on purpose if I tried. For anyone that doesn’t know what WEC is, and I hope that is most of you, it stands for World Extreme Cagefighting. Yee-haw! Scariest part yet, is that at a few points, I was straining to hear the commentators. So what is this sudden fascination with a “sport” I have never even heard of before? Honestly, there isn’t any. We all do things when no one is looking that we wouldn’t dream of admitting. We may not even want to, we just get absorbed in something unexpected and the next thing you know it, you’re watching Paris Hilton’s “My New BFF.”

I have lots of dirty little habits I don’t want to claim. I have watched TMZ on TV, seem to always get sucked into the Bachelor and Bachelorette for the last four episodes, greatly enjoy formulaic chick flicks, and can absorb a 400 page romance novel in an afternoon. There have even been days at home when I’ve accidentally sat through an entire episode of Oprah. I say accidentally because in these situations you never intend to read a Barbara Taylor Bradford novel, you just pick it up to look at the cover and the next thing you know it’s four hours later and your Mom’s book collection is one closer to being in your library.

Are we ashamed of our own nature? Do we seriously feel that we have to be better than, all the time? Can’t we just relax and watch a little bad TV without the guilt of it making us as cheesy as Ms. Hilton herself? I am not so weak minded that I won’t watch TMZ if I want to just because I’m afraid someone might find out, but I don’t necessarily respect myself for it either. I have a friend who frequently buys magazines like People, inTouch, and US. I would NEVER buy these myself and I’m sure I have made fun of them more than once, but every time I am at her house I lunge for those damn mags to make catty comments about what celebrities are wearing, visible cellulite on actresses thighs, and why anyone still thinks Cris Angel is cool.

I am still going to disparage sports like WEC and UFC and I can pretty much assure you that I will not ever purchase inTouch or the like on my own and even if I do start DVRing Oprah, I’m not going to let you know. Some things are so personal that we don’t even want to admit them to ourselves. I am a book snob. I read literature with a capital “L” and that does not include Harry Potter, romance novels, or Tom Clancy. Even so, there are days when I’d almost like to not have to think so hard. Finnegan is making me tired and has left my literary snobbishness in his wake. Can’t a girl just read People while watching the Today show without feeling like a failure?