Ugh. Should be a milestone day, but I’m not feeling it. Let’s just say that some days are good ones and some days not so much. I am a work in progress and while I do like myself, I recognize that I am prone to screwing things up. No one does self-sabotage better than me, honey. Still, I do try to keep my eye on the big picture, but sometimes the means to the end is not the path others would like me to take. I look at it this way, I am not a person you want to put under a microscope because if you do, you are always going to find something you don’t like. I’m best at a distance or in doses, but I need lots of space and being in my life means that sometimes you are not going to like my choices. Hell, sometimes I don’t like my choices, but I’m doing what I know how to do to get to where I need and want to be. I’m not a big fan of the way a lot of people in my life live either, but sometimes you just have to step back and ignore the bad so you can see the good. What’s that saying, you can’t see the forest for the trees? Well I’m the forest and all the stupid shit I do are the trees, but if you focus on that, you’re going to miss the really good stuff. And trust me, there is plenty of good stuff there. I may not easy to love, but I’m real and I’m working on it.
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