Day 206: It's Not How You Celebrate, it's How it Makes You Feel

I am discovering that the holidays mean different things to different people and that is okay. For me, I celebrate Christmas, but not in the Christian sense of it which I know many people will take issue with, but oh well. It’s not just any way of celebrating it that makes it real for me, it has to be a very specific set of circumstances precipitated by childhood tradition. Over the years there have been Christmases in tropical locations, alone in the city, time spent with the in-laws and one or two I can’t remember. We all celebrate in different ways, but if you had to change your tradition would it still feel like Christmas to you (or whatever you celebrate)?

I love my in-laws. They have been generous and loving from the first day I met them, but they have a very small clan and do not put on a big, festive display at Christmas. It’s just sort of . . . well, a half-hearted tree, normal dinner and presents. Every year I have spent the holidays with them I feel like I missed it. That “it” being the excitement and joy that I remember growing up with at this time of year. There have been some truly memorable holidays including one spent in a beachfront cottage in the Caribbean, but without the chaos of my extended family and food enough to feed a small village, though it always seems to be just enough, it’s not Christmas.

So is this time of year more about the actual Christian, Jewish, Pagan, etc., ritual or your own personal ritual? Can it be Christmas without God or some magical baby? I think it can be and despite not participating in some religious tradition that just so happens to coincide with the ancient Pagan winter solstice (seriously, God people try to be at least a little original), Christmas is my favorite holiday. It is that one time of year when most of the world celebrates some major holiday at the same time. To me, that is the spirit of the season. We are all joyous and merry for some reason even if it is not exactly the same and I think that’s okay.

I don’t need you to be Jewish or Christian or even non-religious to share in glad tidings. Believe what you want, but when you smile at me and wish me a “Merry Christmas” and I say it back or perhaps Happy Holidays or Season’s Greetings instead, it is absolutely meant with the same generosity and merriment. I guess my point is that we do not need to share the same belief system to harbor the same feeling in our hearts. I am just as giving and happy without that baby in a barn thing and I don’t need a menorah, though they certainly are pretty. I’m not entirely sure what the Kwanzaa traditions are, but I’ve had a Festivus party and though the airing of grievances is one of my favorites I’m okay without it.

We talk a lot about the true spirit of Christmas and really just saying that is cutting off a third of the population. Not everyone celebrates Christmas. The true spirit of the holiday season is about celebrating however you want, yet maintaining that same sense of generosity and joy. You don’t need to be like everyone else to give back or share a smile. I will never find another tradition or group of people that evoke the same happiness as the 20-30 people we call family in Indiana, but that’s okay. I can still with you Season’s Greetings and mean it most sincerely.