A group of hot, too-young girls get invited into the VIP room of a club to hang with some bigshot celebs or athletes. They enjoy the free food, drink, and swank accommodations of the VIP section. They laugh, joke and flirt all night with these men, who an hour before they’d never met and who they very well know do not want to be their new best friends. I’m not saying when things shake out and there is an accusation that a girl was sexually assaulted that she deserved it, but I will argue that nothing comes for free and she knew this when she went into the VIP room with strangers.
I’m not going to argue a legal position here, because we all know I’d lose and honestly I would never make this claim legally. No woman, regardless of behavior, dress, or promises made, deserves to be assaulted. Women do not ask to be raped or groped simply because they wear a revealing top or short skirt. So before I continue with my point I want to make that perfectly clear.
That said, we all know the rules of social interaction. These are not toddlers making their way in the bar scene for the first time. A man does not buy you a drink simply because his wallet is too heavy from all the money. This doesn’t mean you owe him anything, but you know when you accept that drink and refuse to even make polite conversation and pretend to for a minimum of three minutes that you’re being a bitch and taking advantage. Are men stupid for buying drinks to get attention or supplying food, drink and other random party favors in the VIP digs just to get girls to be nice to them, of course! Neither of these scenarios, however, are the point.
My issue with these situations, is that the girls are fully willing to take whatever they think they can get out of man and they’ll sell their integrity to do it, but when the bill finally comes they don’t want to pay up. That is manipulation straight up. You want to keep out of these difficult situations? Then don’t pretend that you had no idea the guy wanted something more than simply the pleasure of paying for your shit. Men want Geishas. When you go into the VIP room you are expected to perform as a Geisha. You flirt, entertain, and generally make the guy feel important and attractive. That is your job, his is to pay you for your time with drinks, food, etc. The catch here, is that unlike Geishas who have a strictly defined set of rules on interactions, we don’t. So if you’re flirting to get those drinks there is a good chance he’ll expect more.
Here’s an easy fix: Don’t expect others to pay your way! Nothing in life is free and eventually the tab will come. Tossing your hair and giggling does not erase the fact that you are trying to manipulate a man because you know he’s looking for a hot girl to entertain him. This isn’t the champagne room, there are no bouncers to make sure his hands stay on the chair, once you agree to the exchange of goods for entertainment you’re kind of on the hook. Stop trading your smile for drinks you should pay for yourself and don’t go into the VIP room just because it’s cool. Those men are still people and dehumanizing them to get what you want just makes you a crappy human. Pay your own way. You’ll be a little poorer and you won’t the star treatment, but you will get to keep your self-respect.
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