Life is wasted on people. That is a line in the movie Greenberg with Ben Stiller in the lead. I love this movie. Stiller players Roger Greenberg, a compulsively fucked up, self-absorbed recently sanatorium housed man trying to get his shit together. It’s an awkward film filled with awkward and flawed characters and it’s a bit hard to watch. Imagine Curb Your Enthusiasm without the humor and all the awkwardness. Still, something about this film made me think about people and the way we all interact with one another.
It’s always the crazy one or the bluntly honest one that gets criticism. They stand out from the herd and the others band together to deflect any negative attention they might otherwise garner for themselves. To me, the crazy and honest one however only serves to highlight the flaws in the others. The masses strive to fit in, to not get noticed, because any attention, even positive attention could just as easily go the other way. It is human nature to, in fact, animal nature to single out the weak. I understand this, but I disagree with what makes one weak.
We talk a lot about differences being tolerated, but that never seems to extend to what we believe should be “normal.” We will tolerate different races, religions, genders, disabilities, and sexual orientations. A variance from our definition of normal however enjoys no such protection or tolerance. The crazy and honest are too bold, too intense, too confrontational, too . . . something. What many do not see, however, is that we crazy and honest types see you and we don’t care. We know you’ll judge us, mock us, and unfriend us, but it changes nothing. People talk so much of morality and family values, but so few people have ethics these days and no, they are not the same.
An ethical person does not need people to like them and is spared the soul-crushing burden of playing the two-faced games so many people cannot get away from. Life is too short to spend it unhappily acting your way through or saying what you should say. Greenberg did not intentionally become an iconoclast, but his inherent inability to play the games created a background for the starkly contrasted “normalcy” of the world. I guess I’m not in that category, because I spent most of the movie not focused on the flawed lead character, but on those of everyone else around him. I don’t know if the movie made me feel better about my life, or worse, but it definitely made me feel better about being crazy and honest.
So I posted last night on ur blog but- once again forgot to enter the code~~ Lost it all- it was good too!! LOL maybe not- maybe that is why I lost it!! So I'll try again on another topic~
ReplyDeleteI believe that my biggest flaw is my need to be "liked" I have learned in the last 10 years-( why it took that long I'll neve know) that it really doesn't matter too much what others think of me as long as I am true to myself and who I am and what I believe. I've learned from others judging me that I really have no right to judge others- Unless they are my kids and then its just too bad for them. But seriously, I can judge them because it is truely out of love and not something else.
Being honest in our world usually doesn't pan out. I mean it sounds great but how many politicians are completely honest? If they were no one would vote for them- So instead they just feed us lies and we figure it out and get disgusted. I mean this of both parties - it's really annoying.
We all have a story and that will mold the person that we are and how we see things.
I think Sean has been great for me in this aspect. He could give a shit what others think. He's not mean but he will not apoloigize for his view and beliefs but will be open to here a different point of view. I feel to be like this you have to have a sort of confidence in yourself and not worry about what others think. I lean both ways. I believe strongly about some things and have gotten the courage to stand up for them. I on the other hand still get my "feelings" hurt every so often. I know I'm a work in progress.
Honesty and integrity are very rare but when found there is not a price tag to put on them.
And to yesterday's post. I just am going to say- It sounds like Jeff is a man. They need to feel needed just like we need to feel sexy and wanted. They kinda go together:)I think it's a testosterone thing!! I take that over estrogen any day;)
So should I watch the movie?