Saturday, May 29, 2010

Day 358: Go Ahead and Jump, We All Need It

Why are there some things that we do just because they are against the rules? A particular act that on its own might not be all that exciting or appealing suddenly becomes so much more compelling simply because there is a possibility that you might get in trouble. As children and teens we may do things that get us into trouble, but we don't really want to be punished, as adults there might be times, however, when the very possibility of being arrested or ticketed is cool simply for the story.Who are these risk takers and why do they do it?


My friend Colleen jumped off a rock wall into a lake today with the lake police staked out nearby. She was thinking about jumping anyway, but the warnings by fellow boaters that the lake fuzz were ticketing for that very act proved too much for her to deny. She jumped and after no one admonished her for it she became a little disappointed. Where was her moment of glory for breaking the rules and living like a rebel? It's hard to be a badass when not even the lake equivalent of mall security take notice.


Life can be pretty staid and as we get older and more experienced the quest for adventure or novelty might take us in unexpected directions. Rebelling against authority is not reserved just for teenagers, even adults need to feel a little wild and out of control now and again. Most adults are generally responsible individuals with families, careers, and respectability. For them, giving the bird to Bed, Bath and Beyond as they drive by might be all the rebellion they need. Just as diving off a rock illegally might be the leather jacket and greased back hair of their otherwise responsible Mommy-time. 


We need adventure to feel alive and young. It is the unpredictability and even uncertainty in life that leave us with that charge of adrenaline. So a Mom with four kids, husband and countless responsibilities gets off on playing hooky and taking a day for herself once in a while or the serious businessman with very grounded vision loses himself in video games two hours a week. We need these outlets and somehow the more dangerous or consequence-laden they seem, the more inevitable they become. 


Oddly enough, for someone like me it is almost the opposite. I do not live a life of great responsiblity to others. My life is mine and aside from juggling the responsibilities of partnering up, I get to make mistakes, speak inadvisably, and generally fuck up whenever I want. I live a little bit like my hair is on fire all the time so when a situation presents itself that can make others feel alive, I usually do not feel that same pull. I already routinely drive 90, rebel against authority and duck responsibility. I have clashed  with parents, teachers, bosses, friends and the law and my adrenaline response to it is no longer what it used to be. I live a fairly wild life in many respects so I do not always need to seek out the extra drama. 


Conversely, those of you in the world that find yourselves living for more than just your own gratification are likely to experience this outlaw orgasm. You are the pleasers of life, the middle children, the easy-going, the responsibility driven. You do what is expected of you and crave the adrenaline rush of doing something ill-advised or taboo. So you jump from that rock and secretly hope that by weekend's conclusion you'll be regaling the crowd with stories of your $75 ticket for . . . well, whatever offense something like jumping off a rock into the lake might be. You need it because like all of us, we need balance. I live an breathe rebellion so what I need is stability -- enter the husband. You might live stability and need a little crazy. Either way, we're all looking for the same overall balance, we just assess risk a bit differently. I jump a little each day, but the danger in that is that sooner or later I'm going to find myself too tired or too far out to make it back to safety. It's a game of balance and without that, our lives will forever be unsatisfied.

No comments:

Post a Comment